I. D. K.

I don't know. 

Friendly, adj.:

She's covered in sunlight bruises. A part of him thinks she might burst into a thousand different colors. She melts into beige and yellow on his shoulder when she rests her head. He talks to everyone else, paying them his attention in fragments. He shovels his foot into some pebbles on the ground and brushes his arm by her arm with all intention. She doesn't notice.

They're friends. She puts her hand on his hand. Everyone is here -- everyone can see. Maybe it's just one of those things; like her hand just fell there and maybe she didn't want to move it. Her fingers curl around the edges of his palm and there are no gasps. He slides his hand away and she almost sees it coming. Crest-fallen, she keeps smiling a muted orange skimming the corners of her lips.

After a little bit, she excuses herself to go to the restroom. He stands up a few beats after she does and walks in the same direction. She knows, she can feel him trailing behind her so she slows. He jogs forward. He asks if they can maybe talk sometime and she shrugs. He bumps his arm into her shoulder and a little shock jolts him. She doesn't notice.

The sky is a pale gray; it's going to rain. The wind gets cooler as the afternoon settles into dusk -- she's still sitting somewhere covered in sunlight bruises. She could be fifty or five hundred feet away. The thought of her is a flicker in his subconscious, the irritating flash of a camera in the dark. He thinks of other things, all the while keeping the thought of her in post-its and pretending not to notice. 

***

On a different night, she's dusted in moonlight and he can't stop thinking about it. Streetlight suits her. She fumbles with her fingers before lacing her arm in his, clutching it. He walks an inch of a step closer and holds his arm at a good ninety degrees to keep her comfortable. She knows she's welcome and she takes it. She pushes him playfully and he pushes her gently, knowing he could knock her to the ground if he wanted. But he didn't want to.

They talk, they joke, she's letting her guard down (not that she had one). From this angle he sees the dimming light in her eyes and it's a little troubling. More than that, her hands are heavy. More than that, she's falling. She trips over her own feet and he catches her before it happens. He holds her up. She apologizes. 'Sorry for being a bit weak today', she slurs. He nods an 'it's okay' before going back to walking under exit signs and street lights, liking the way her hands are holding him with necessity.

***

It's seven in the morning. She's sitting alone wrapped in a sweater and obvious want for something to lie on. He sits next to her and is happy and says hi and brushes her hair back. She laughs and shakes him off and nudges his shoulder with her head. She nuzzles into him, moaning for sleep. Her smell lulls him into familiarity; her skin doesn't make him tremble. But her lips might.

He takes her hand and plays with it, two hands to play with one of hers. She's comfortable on the bones of his shoulders, eyes closed and dreaming of better beds. He traces "Please?" on her palm and sighs. This time she notices. She smiles. Ten minutes go by without event. Friends start arriving and conversation bursts to life. She's leaning against a brick wall instead of the sleeve of his shirt. When the bell rings, she stands and looks up at him and whispers, 

                            "Maybe." 





Should I continue this? :/ Actually answer me. :)) 

25: Resolve.

i don't feel the pain i once did 

there lives an old box where i shot it sure dead 

with you gone, there's nothing to lift

there's nothing to carry, to patch up, to thread

23: Temporarily Untitled

I'm only doing the ones I think I can actually do at this point. :)) Wow am I lagging behind. 

20: Catching Up

i.

she curls to fit into his lines, and his curves, and the bouquet of scents that envelopes him. she could smell the salt of the sea dusting his skin, his fingers smelt like coffee and newspaper ink. under his nails, she could taste her future.

19: For A Friend

personal ads. 

18: 4/19/13

Night embraces us, all of us, and loves us in its darkness

The pool lights aren't bright enough and I can't tell who is who 

and you're just another person I haven't seen in far too long

Your shoulders feel the same though we've spent months 

and months and months apart.
I have not seen you in so long but all the
natural fluidity that was once our friendship
is still as rapturing as before and maybe.
There is no end to all our plays and pauses
and you and I are just circling each other in
complete and total admiration, locked in a state of
permanence and marriage and coming alive by the water,
coming alive under street lights, coming alive in the dead of night.